Number Sixty-One

I don't care what Pinterest says. Do NOT use your refrigerator as a dry-erase board.

Number Fifty-Three

Acetone does not, in fact, remove Super Glue from skin.

Number Forty-One

Green is the most pernicious of food coloring shades - sometimes even a small amount of green icing is enough to cause oddly colored bodily fluids for days.

Number Eleven

When the exterminator comes to your house and sprays his noxious chemicals, the bugs aren't going to just die wherever it is they're hiding. They will crawl out into the middle of the room to die so that in a matter of hours, it looks like you need to call an exterminator.